Not to a beachfront condo or high-rise industrial loft (a girl can dream but a girl should also limit the hours of HGTV she watches), but to a fancy pants new blog.
Come on over and check out my new digs!
Soon, there won’t be much left to see here, unless your name happens to be “Big Shot Client in Need of Freelance Writing.” In which case, [insert firm but not masculine handshake and charming but not too flirty eye contact here] …

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So here’s a true story. I just typed out my best 15 attempts at “hors d’oeuvre” and was so off every single time that spell check did not once rescue me with the correct spelling. Shortcut fail. I did get superb suggestions like devious and hourly, maybe hinting that I’m such a terrible speller I should switch to a more devious profession involving fishnets, desperate business men and hourly rates? My favorite suggestion was “no spelling suggestions,” basically spell check’s polite …

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Mimic the noises your dog makes back to him to see if you can have a conversation.
Show up without shoes. But with purple socks on.
Pee with the door open.
Proofread out loud. In character.
Eat cereal at your desk. And chips and salsa. During the same lunch hour.
Roll your eyes and laugh out loud at the ridiculous, last minute request in your inbox.
Decide not to swap the post-shower towel for actual clothes.
Decide not to shower.
Keep the same Amos Lee song on repeat …

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Did I mention that I’m freelancing full time? Yeah, that happened. Sorry if you didn’t get invited to the party, but you wouldn’t have come anyway. It was in God-forsaken Newport News.
We added to our family. Her name is Tyra and she is a sparkly black 2011 Honda Civic and awesome and I love her and throw out that coffee because we’re leasing.
The gym has been oh-so-good to my moods. And my love handles.
Clayton and I stumbled upon a little …

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I fear that you have misunderstood. Or that I’ve been misleading.
My life, here in Newport News, Virginia, is incredible. I speak of sadness and missing and what-am-I-doing-here moments,
but
I am healthy.
Whether nature or nurture, it is not in my composition to adjust to being far away from
Brenda or Ken or Tony
or Grace
or aunt-uncle-cousins families.
So, constant undercurrents of emotion
surge and wane
at unpredictable and strange times.
While every day is not spotless from tears,
my everyday is filled with
laughing with my husband
and playing with my …

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November was my favorite month of this year.
I rocked Thanksgiving dinner. Like, to the point all those “mmms” were worrying me that my culinary bar was being raised before my eyes. As if I was going to start doing this more than once every 26 years. HA! Joke’s on you, family. I’m not Brett Favring my career in the kitchen.

I’d decided that, no matter what was happening or not happening with a potential writing career, it was time to quit …

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It’s approaching the nine month anniversary of our move to Virginia , of the voluntary upheaval of our previous life to chase after an adventure that had seeped into our minds years before. An hour ago, I would not have had many uplifting things to say about this decision. But I grabbed the notebook I always keep by my bed (full disclosure: to write down Halloween costume ideas for Clayton and I), and I began reading the first few pages. …

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I’m a writer. And not in the in-my-spare-time, when-I-need-to-use-profanity-privately kind of way. I am a writer in a totally legitimate, business meeting on the fifth floor, “what are your rates?” kind of way.
A few weeks ago I landed my very first freelance writing gig. I am still trying to wrap my head around the fact that someone has offered to pay for my writing. This idea lodged in the recesses of my brain growing up, an abandoned dream when I got …

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I Normally Don’t Curse, But Get the Hell Away from My Chocolate
No, I Didn’t Let My Dad Record My Outgoing Message; That’s My Phone Voice
I’m Sexiest in Pajamas. Someone Should Tell My Husband.
Tales From An Online Student/Stay at Home Napper
How Gilmore Girls Changed My Life and My Vocabulary
My Dog is Cuter Than Your Dog. And Probably Your Kid.
101 Ways to Sarcastically Embellish Anything That Happens to You
Notes From The Underside of the Coffee Maker
Figuring Out What to Do With Your …

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Literally just found out about this: National Novel Writing Month.
50,000 words in a month, knowing full well that with that kind of deadline ”you will be writing a lot of crap.”
But if I crank out 170 pages of crap and 5 decent pages, that’s still 5 pages of a potential novel I didn’t have before, right? Right?! I’m very close to clicking that “Sign Up Now” button…

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