Jul 12

I’ve Moved!

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Not to a beachfront condo or high-rise industrial loft (a girl can dream but a girl should also limit the hours of HGTV she watches), but to a fancy pants new blog.
Come on over and check out my new digs!
Soon, there won’t be much left to see here, unless your name happens to be “Big Shot Client in Need of Freelance Writing.” In which case, [insert firm but not masculine handshake and charming but not too flirty eye contact here] …

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Jul 7

The Indigestion and Nightmares are Totally Worth It

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Sorry for disappearing. There are some changes a-brewin’ in my little corner of the blogosphere, so stay tuned for that.
Plus, Camp Noa was a little busy hosting my brother and his adorable girlfriend for a few days. Some of the best days since we’ve been in Virginia, actually. We made quite a fabulous foursome.
We figured the best way to celebrate the freedoms and independence of these United States of America was to gorge ourselves on frozen yogurt, pear cider (ahem, …

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Jun 24

How to Succeed at Moving without Really Trying

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I’m going to do you a solid here and share a few tips and tricks I’ve learned from moving 11 times in 9 years. Use them if you dare, or follow my #1 piece of advice to NEVER, EVER MOVE. Not from your parents’ house, not from your 10×10 college dorm room, not from living next door to that guy you saw on “To Catch a Predator.” Just be happy to have the sum of your life’s possessions safely scattered about your …

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Jun 19

For Tree

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It’s Saturday morning. 5:41 a.m. I have about an hour until my alarm goes off suggesting a morning run and about an hour and three seconds until I toss it out the window. Clayton and I (and Bryson) are awoken by the sound of the entire house shaking, like someone with an otherworldly wing span grabbed the four corners and went to town for a few seconds.
In the same breath, Clayton darts up, says, “sounded like thunder,” and falls right back to …

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Jun 15

Bryson + Steroids = BFF4LIFE

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In case I haven’t mentioned it in the last hour, my dog is a medical mystery. About a year into his awkward life, he broke out in full body hives. He has since seen three vets and one animal dermatologist (yes, they exist, and just like human medical specialists, they ask the same questions and charge twice as much). And we still don’t have a concrete answer as to what exactly he is allergic to. But boy do we know …

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Jun 12

Hooters is good for my marriage. (It’s complicated.)

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I don’t know if there is a better place to people watch than the outdoor deck of Hooters during the night hours of Norfolk’s Harborfest. From the blinding white scrunched tube socks/high top sneaker combo bopping through the restaurant (which is what Clayton swore he was looking at when he was swivel-heading it between chicken wings) to the boatmen and women who’d docked for the night and were seriously jamming out to The Macarena–because Norfolk is nothing if not cutting …

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Jun 8

Nick Lachey is an Ungrateful Prima Donna

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Ok, maybe he is, maybe he isn’t. But, just like his career and marriage, Nick Lachey did freeze my computer. And after all these years of being Team Nick, envisioning myself as the Doritos girl in that video and not mocking the full on winter white ribbed turtleneck. The nerve.

Per usual, cleaning out the office became 7 hours of sitting Indian style on the floor looking through photo albums, reading through diaries from the most dramatic four years of high …

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Jun 5

Thankful for the Freedom to Embarrass Myself at Cornhole

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Clayton and I spent Memorial Day weekend acting brilliantly normal and pretending like we had friends after we got invited to/stood close enough to people talking about a barbecue.
I was so excited to actually spend time with people other than my husband and dog (love you boys!) I laid my clothes out 16 hours in advance and planned Sunday down to the second in schoolgirlish anticipation. It was sweetly frightening, even to me, and had anyone remotely connected to this …

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May 21

Nike-sponsored masochism

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I’m running again. And on one hand, it’s a good thing, preventing heart disease, balancing hormones, yada yada yada. On the other hand, I’m pretty competitive. Usually, that cold blooded drive to stomp other competitors to the ground leads to positive achievements, like being Valedictorian and having the highest free throw percentage on a district championship basketball team. (If you didn’t notice, those are also accomplishments very unlikely to appear in casual conversation once you turn old enough to vote. …

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May 16

Like Us Weekly. With less cleavage and more panic attacks.

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Long story short: we had a May trip to Florida planned months ago. At the last minute, I got creative, turned the whole trip on its head, gave it a good shove and still managed to avoid stepping on an airplane.  
I don’t want to bore/nauseate/confuse you to tears with the details of my itinerary. Mainly because I’m still not exactly sure what they were myself; I just sort of got in my car every five days and hoped it knew …

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