I am having a really hard time not writing a seething post about the illogical logic that most twenty-something females use to justify defining “costume” as adding wings, a tail, or fake bunny ears to lingerie. Apparently, we are all desperate for a chance to show the world what we look like in our skivvies, and Halloween has become the perfectly acceptable chance to do that. I mean, that’s what I would write if I chose to write such a post. But I’ve …

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Things Bryson has eaten in the last month:
Used q-tip (I don’t know if it had been used for ear cleaning or makeup removal, but neither seems hopeful.)
The stuffing of the couch cushions
The crumbs from the previous couch owner behind the couch cushions
Most of the tissues I had thrown away when I was sick
16 dog bones
The big toe portion of an athletic sock (I like to let that toe breathe, anyway.)
Leftover meatloaf (By leftover, I mean I made meatloaf about 8 …

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You’re looking at a very happy girl. It’s a bit sad how my mood can completely rely on where I end up getting my coffee in the morning. This morning it completely worked out in my favor, though, so whatev.
My sister-in-law Kathleen told me about Dancing Goats coffe bar in Decatur, Georgia, and I took her up on the suggestion. Do I need to back up? I’m getting ahead of myself. And if you’re wondering why I’m talking like a spastic psycho, it’s not the large …

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A few weeks ago I had one of the worst days of my young life. I know that’s uselessly relative and cryptic, but that’s not what this is really about. In the middle of the worst part of the awfulness, these words were said: “Life is ugly.” Even sitting there in the midst of pain and tears and lowest lows, I didn’t want to believe that. I’ve always tried to cling to the comforting notion that Life is beautiful — at the core, there is beauty and happy …

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Literally just found out about this: National Novel Writing Month.
50,000 words in a month, knowing full well that with that kind of deadline ”you will be writing a lot of crap.”
But if I crank out 170 pages of crap and 5 decent pages, that’s still 5 pages of a potential novel I didn’t have before, right? Right?! I’m very close to clicking that “Sign Up Now” button…

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1. The number of centimeters you are dilated.
2. Any sentence that includes the word “cervix.” 
3. The number of contractions you have had, how long your contractions are lasting, and how strong your contractions are. For the love, turn off the iphone and breathe, woman.
4. Except for maybe sinusitis, if it ends with -itis, I don’t want to know you have it.
5. Your newborn is breastfeeding. Like, right now. If you’ve shared that you do have a newborn, the fact that little junior needs …

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I know there are worse than things in life than having a cold. But the phlegm oozing around my brain has drowned any sense of perspective I could hope to have, and all I feel like doing is whining about how sick I am of being sick. This is the second debilitating cold I’ve had in three weeks. Who gets two colds in a month? My infant immune system is obviously trying to send me a snotty, congested message, and I’m all …

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So. Last weekend was a hoot. Yes, FSU lost. Yes, I had to hear about it from every USF student/coworker I saw on Monday (I may have talked just a smidgen of trash the week before). But in the bigger scheme of things, those three and a half hours were just a small unbearably hot and suffocatingly humid fraction of our walk down memory lane.
What I liked best about the trip was that it was a perfect mixture of new …

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Besides bringing home the swine and being witness to one of the most horrid displays of football inadequacy ever, this weekend was a raging success. Ok, I didn’t bring home Matt‘s actual swine flu, just a boring old cold, but I keep crossing my fingers to catch that elusive sickness one of these days. You know, for the story.
I don’t have time to go into all the haps now, but for a split second I thought that living in Tallahassee …

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